You just never know what kind of support will show up when you start a conversation about light bladder leakage. While attending an event last week, I met Dr. Stacey Francis, a chiropractic kinesiologist in Southfield, Michigan. Since I’m always on the lookout for new ways to manage LBL, I asked, “Does the work you do help women improve light bladder leakage?” (Yes. I’m that bold!)

“Light bladder leakage has been a frequent complaint of several of my patients,” said Dr. Francis. She told me about a woman who came to see her for chronic right hip pain. Dr. Francis found a pelvic muscle imbalance and corrected it. A few weeks later the patient returned, thrilled that her hip pain was 90% improved, and the LBL she was experiencing was gone.

“I asked why she never told me she had bladder leakage in the first place, and she told me that she didn’t think a chiropractor could help with that,” said Dr. Francis.

While structural misalignment isn’t the only contributing factor for LBL, it can be a culprit.

Muscles pull on bones. “Have you noticed that dentists are always leaning over in only one direction? Keeping muscles at a set length for long periods allows them to adopt that length and pulls the structure into distortion,” she said, “When you sit all day at your desk, go to the gym to ride a stationary bike for an hour, then drive 40 minutes home and sit on the couch to relax for the rest of the night, you’re training certain muscles to be short, pulling on the bones they are attached to.”

Chiropractic Kinesiologists, like Dr. Francis, isolate and test muscles to determine imbalances. Corrections of rotations or compressions of the bones in your spine can instantly strengthen a previously weak muscle allowing it to get the nerve supply it needs to function optimally.

I asked Dr. Francis, “What can women do to improve their alignment and LBL?” Here’s a few of her suggestions:

- Strengthening the butt muscles and keeping the muscles of the back of the leg, the front of the leg and the front of the hip at their optimal lengths is an important part in maintaining your structure. Squats are a simple and effective way to strengthen your butt muscles and keep this system aligned properly.

- Increase alkalinity in the body with mineral-rich foods like nuts and seeds, and dark leafy vegetables. Also limiting acidic foods like dairy, meat and grains can increase the body to a healthy pH.

- Take a mineral complex at night, when you absorb it best, to replenish depleted stores of magnesium.

- See your friendly chiropractic kinesiologist, doctor of physical therapy, or work with a skilled pilates or yoga instructor, and don’t forget to squat.

What about you?
What helps you to manage LBL?

Getting that gotta-go feeling can be a real challenge at work. When I was expecting my first baby, I consulted for a fast growing company. This meant being housed in a temporary trailer until the construction of our new office building was complete. The bigger my belly grew, the more often I needed to use the restroom. Unfortunately, the workspace layout made it impossible for me to be discrete. To get to a restroom, I had to walk the entire length of the attached research garage filled with men working on the nuts and bolts of automotive design.

I dreaded the long walk down the center of that massive garage. The guys never said a word, but they had to be placing bets about how many times a day I’d walk by. Entering my last trimester, I didn’t walk; I practically had to run to get there on time. How embarrassing!

I wasn’t the only one dealing with discomfort. While I was managing a pregnancy, my office mate Cathy (20 years my senior) was going through menopause. What a pair we were! I don’t know which of us took that long walk to the restroom more often.

While it helps to see the humor in life, it isn’t always funny. Many women find it embarrassing having to leave in the middle of a long meeting, or end a conference call abruptly. A good friend of mine told me, “I got into the office early. Someone told a funny joke. I laughed, leaked, and realized I didn’t have a pad on. There was no time to go home before my first meeting, so I just had to deal with it.”

For some practical advice on managing LBL at work, we have a helpful article titled, Managing Bladder Leaks at Work. For the emotional side of things, it may help to know that you’re not alone. One in three women experiences light bladder leakage, and there are things you can do. Here are three:

1. Visit a qualified medical expert. Every woman’s body is different, and there are a wide variety of contributing factors that lead to LBL, including unlikely things like smoking, and chronic coughs. Get advice specific to your body so you can discover the best treatment plan for you.

2. When LBL interferes with your ability to get work done, have a candid talk with those who work with you. Once you get over the initial discomfort, you’re likely to receive support and find some solutions that will allow you to get on with your day in a way that will better work for you.

3. Remember you’re not alone. Many women in the workplace experience LBL too. Give yourself the advice you would give a good girlfriend. It will help you stay resourceful so that LBL won’t stop you from being active and involved both at work and in your personal life.

What about you?
How do you overcome those awkward LBL moments at work?

The birds were chirping early this morning. When I looked outside I saw a big, bold dandelion growing right in the middle of my lawn. Every spring, when I pluck out weeds, and prune back branches, that certain something in the air can send me into fits of sneezing.

Tearing eyes, and a dripping nose aren’t the only leaks brought on by the pollen in the air. Constant coughs and sneezes put pressure on your bladder, and that can lead to light bladder leakage.

Here are some things you can do to keep LBL under control this spring:

• Stomp out the Symptoms. Chronic coughs and sneezing can weaken your pelvic floor, making you more likely to leak. Nip those symptoms in the bud. Ask your medical professional to explore treatments that are right for you. You may choose natural remedies like herbs or locally grown honey to hedge off your coughing and sneezing fits. Some prefer alternative treatments like acupuncture or conventional medications. It may also help to use an air purifier and allergen reducing vacuum cleaner bags inside your home to reduce your symptoms even further.

• Protect Yourself. When you tend to a garden, you probably bring along a shovel, hoe, and pruning shears, but that’s not enough. You also need tools to protect yourself so you can keep going - gloves protect your hands, a knee cushion keeps you comfortable, and sunglasses take the strain off your eyes. Remember to wear an LBL specific pad too, so that unwanted leaks don’t slow you down.

• Work Those Muscles. If you’re like me, springtime can bring on a renewed focus on fitness. Muscles don’t tone themselves. (Darn!) That’s why I recently started a new exercise program. Did you know that strong pelvic floor muscles can help prevent LBL? And just like toning the tummy, there are exercises that tighten that area. Kegel exercise, yoga, and Pilates are examples of workouts that can support your pelvic floor strength. Make a habit of exercising your pelvic floor muscles daily, especially during allergy season.


• Squeeze Before You Sneeze. There’s a nifty little way to reduce leaks whenever you’re about to cough or sneeze. It’s called “The Knack” and you can read more details about it from my previous blog post here. Basically all you need to do is squeeze and lift the pelvic floor just before you sneeze or cough. It really does help lessen the leaks.

How about you?
With the arrival of spring, and all those outdoor chores, what are you doing to manage LBL?

Last night I was one of eight coaches who gathered to support a local community. We started our meeting with introductions. I shared my coaching experience, and my work as a professional speaker. “I’m also the Community Manager for Poise,” I said, explaining a bit about light bladder leakage and the difference our Poise community makes for the 1 in 3 of us who experience LBL.

Have you ever noticed that when you’re comfortable talking about LBL, it makes those around you more comfortable as well? No one raised an eyebrow… not even the retired policeman in our group. What happened next was a happy surprise. A lovely woman about my age, with big blue eyes and the perfect shade of blond hair, introduced herself. She didn’t start with her credentials. She started by saying, “I’m not married, and I guess I forgot to have kids! I’m a customer of your Poise pads. At this point in my life, I need them. It is what it is. And I’m glad I have a way to make things easier.”

She shared so freely and with such ease. As I looked around the table, several women were nodding their heads. Her disclosure didn’t ruffle anyone’s feathers, or alienate her in any way. As a matter of fact, people felt closer to her and freer to be themselves. I loved her phrase – “It is what it is.” I wish I could bottle her confidence and make it available to every woman who has ever felt alone, embarrassed or afraid of being judged.

Every time I interview a gynecologist, urologist, or pelvic floor specialist, I always asks them, “What do you want women to know?” In one way or another, they all say, “Please don’t be embarrassed to ask questions about LBL and tell me what’s going on. It’s the only way I can help.”

Imagine what might happen if a trusted friend were to tell you that she experiences an occasional leak. My guess is it would open up an opportunity for some really great sharing, caring, and camaraderie.

Why not be the first to broach the subject? You can warm up by sharing your comments on this blog post, ask me a question, or comment on our message board.

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Edited by MarilynSuttle at Mar 27, 2012 8:07 AM PDT

As women, we learn to be discrete. Whether it’s managing a heavy period, coping with an LBL moment, or cooling down a hot flash, throughout our lives we have more going on inside than what appears on the surface. Others may see a slight eyebrow raise, a momentary “oh no!” expression, or a quick gasp, but on the inside we’re freaking out!

Those alarming moments can take a toll on your nerves. To get some new ideas for restoring a sense of peace and wellbeing, I reached out to Gail Edgell the founder of Inside Out Wellness, and the acclaimed 360 Menopause website. She offered three easy tips for restoring the calm.

• Keep a Journal. It’s a gentle way to explore your feelings and release unresolved emotions that otherwise stay underground and build up. Journaling helps you slow down, get present, and even notice some positive things you have in your life that you might have been overlooking.

• Five Minutes of Deep Breathing. Take five minutes out of your day to sit in a quiet place where you won’t be disturbed. “If you’re a type A personality like me and always on the go, keep your eyes open,” said Gail, “Otherwise you’ll fall asleep.” Be still and present. Take slow deep breaths, not high shallow chest breaths. Belly breathing relieves stress. Put your hand on your stomach and feel it expand.

• Meditate. The key to making meditation work for you, is finding a guided meditation, or music that you like. There are tons of different meditation techniques. You may try five or six saying, “I hate this one. I hate that one. Oh! This one I like!” Find a type of meditation that is right for you. It doesn’t have to be complicated. You can simply visualize a peaceful place.

What about you?
How do you calm yourself after one of those very human moments we experience?

No one wakes up in the morning saying, “I think I’ll form a bad habit today.” Most are started for good reasons. I started relying on coffee in college to help with late night study sessions. Today, I’m left with a habit that no longer serves me, or my bladder. It’s not always easy to ditch an old habit. It helps to find a replacement first, so you have something better to hang on to when you’re tempted to slip back.
Are you ready to update old habits that no longer serve you?

It could be that you’ve gotten in the habit of choosing an inactive lifestyle to avoid the embarrassment of accidental leaks. It seems to work - in the short run. The problem is long term inactivity contributes to LBL, effects overall health, and isolates us from doing things we enjoy.

How can you update your habits of inactivity? One lady shared with me that she sets a countdown timer on her computer that rings every hour. It’s her signal to get up, stretch and walk around a bit. I’m doing that now too! What can you do to put more physical activity into your life? It helps to add in exercise. Yoga, Tai Chi, or Pilates classes, and daily Kegel exercise can get you fit, and it strengthens the muscles of the pelvic floor.

Did you know that smoking contributes to bladder leakage? It’s not an easy habit to break. Even though you know all the reasons why it’s not good for you, it’s not until you decide, and fully commit that you will succeed. Women share with me that when they’re kicking the habit of smoking, it’s tempting to replace it with food, and their weight goes up (another contributor to LBL.) Consider what routines you’d rather be experiencing than smoking or excessive eating. Why not a routine that lets you enjoy a bit of nurturing self-care, like meditation, some quiet time-out to read, or relax?

Another habit that women form with the best of intentions is saying “no” to drinking water. You might reason that the more you drink, the more likely you’ll leak. What ends up happening is you get dehydrated. Urine gets concentrated in the bladder causing irritation, and leaks. It’s fine to refrain from drinking a glass of water near bed time, but drinking water regularly throughout the day actually helps your body to function well, and lessen leaks.

When you update old habits, you get to enjoy a better quality of life. Whether it’s staying dryer by replacing your period-only pad for pads that are LBL specific, or gaining more support, by replacing silence with conversation about LBL with your girlfriends – anytime you’re ready, you can form habits to support you in new and better ways.


What about you? What habits are you ready to replace?

When I first started blogging about light bladder leakage, my friends clammed up whenever I’d talk about it. There was a definite “don’t ask, don’t tell” vibe going on. Today, things have changed. While I was walking out of a coffee shop with my girlfriend Margaret, she followed me to my car saying, “I’ve got a story for your next blog post!”

“It happened at work. At 9 o’clock in the morning, I laughed and realized, ‘Oh #@%#, I leaked!’ I wasn’t wearing a pad. I was wet. And I couldn’t go home,” she said.

Margaret went on to explain that she only wore pads occasionally because she didn’t need them all the time. The problem was, she never knew when it would happen, and over the last couple years it was happening more and more.

“I’ve decided to get over myself, and just add Poise pads to my grocery list. And do my Kegels,” she said.

I’ve always admired Margaret’s “this is what happened” and “this is what I’m going to do about it” approach to life. I’ve seen her do this with dating, child-rearing (she’s a great mom) and now with LBL.

You might be thinking, “I’m not like Margaret. It would be too embarrassing for me to be that matter-of-fact about it.” If so, it might help to know that the first time I started a conversation about LBL, Margaret was too embarrassed to share at first. She thought that she was the only one.

You are not alone. One in three women experiences LBL, and when you start the conversation, it’s so much easier to learn ways to reduce (and sometimes even eliminate) leaks from slowing you down.

What about you?

When did you realize you weren’t the only one to experience LBL?

After setting health and fitness goals for the New Year, do you find yourself a bit more disciplined than usual in January? I do… at least for a little while. I stick to my commitment to eat right, exercise, and work off the extra holiday pounds. I do pretty well for a week or two… but then I see an ad for pizza. I resist it all day. Then, order a large with double cheese by 9 pm. All is not lost. It’s always possible to start again. Are you committing (or recommitting) to your goals to be healthier, fit, and as leak-free as possible in 2012?

Eat, Drink, and Be Leaky???

For some of us, what we eat and drink affects more than our weight. Some choices are not bladder-friendly. A diet soda or cup of coffee might have fewer calories than a smoothie, but it might be sending your bladder into over-drive.

I received an “Ask Marilyn” question last week from a lady who said, “I have been having a cup of instant coffee in the morning this past week; and it has been a week of my worst LBL accidents upon awakening. I am so frustrated. Was I correct when I read somewhere that coffee can contribute to LBL?” She is correct. But here’s the thing - every woman’s body is different. One woman can drink as much coffee as she wants without an issue, while another has trouble with one cup. Carbonated beverages, caffeine, and alcohol are a few of the drinks that can upset the bladder. For some women, spicy foods and chocolate may contribute to LBL too.

What to do? When in doubt test it out. Replace one bladder aggravating food or drink at a time and notice if you see improvements. For a list of bladder-friendly foods, read “What You Eat Matters.”

The Exercise Paradox

When it comes to fitness, exercise is a must. When it comes to light bladder leakage, exercise helps and it can also be a trigger. Too many women stop exercising because they’re afraid to leak through their gym clothes.

I interviewed a urologist a while back (click here to read the post) who shared that a 10 percent weight loss in women with an average body weight of 200 pounds, significantly reduced leakage. Even if you aren’t overweight, inner core and pelvic floor exercises help strengthen the muscles that can prevent leakage.

Don’t give up on exercise. Instead:

- Talk to a medical professional for an exercise plan that’s right for you.
- Wear dark colored exercise pants, or an oversized shirt, and a protective LBL-specific pad.
- Consider replacing jump-roping, and calisthenics, with exercises that strengthen your pelvic floor like Yoga, Pilates, Tai-chi, walking, and daily Kegel exercise.
- Get a girlfriend to be your exercise buddy or accountability partner.
- Remember to celebrate your successes. It will keep you motivated.


What about you?
What goals have you set to be as healthy, fit and leak-free as possible in 2012?

Life Lessons and LBL

Today, I’m sharing a special success formula with you. Whether you experience LBL once in a while, or you deal with it all the time, this formula can help you create the best possible outcome – even in the middle of your most embarrassing moments. You can use this formula whenever you find yourself in any situation that feels outside of your control.

The formula is: E + R = O. I use it often when coaching women, and I teach it in my workshops.

The “E” in the formula stands for an “Event.” What’s an event? You experience an unexpected leak while running from your car to an office building – that’s an event. You enjoy a laugh-out-loud moment with a girlfriend, then … oops, you leak – that’s an event. Events happen. You don’t always have control over it.

The “R” in the formula is your “Response.” It’s how you choose to respond to the “Event.” Most people have an automatic reaction, instead of a conscious response to challenging events, because they don’t realize there’s a choice.

The “O” in the formula is the “Outcome” or result.

Let me give you an example. You’re driving on the expressway. The car behind you is driving too close to your back bumper. That’s the event. You might respond in a variety of ways:

• If your response is to get irritated and annoyed, the outcome is increased stress and feeling miserable.
• If your response is to “teach that driver not to mess with you,” the outcome may turn into road rage.
• If your response is to change lanes and say to yourself, “I’m steering clear of that guy,” you relax and have a pleasant drive.

In each case you experienced the same “Event” and a totally different “Outcome.” Your power in life is in your “Response.” When you make a habit of focusing on your response, a world of new opportunities begins opening up for you.

It may feel like you have no power over your LBL moments. You experience a leak, and the outcome may be that you feel embarrassed, you start holding back your laughter, stop playing with your kids, stay home - you retreat from doing the things you use to enjoy.

What might happen if you changed your response?

I received an “Ask Marilyn” question from a woman who is going overseas and wanted to know if she would be able to find Poise pads in China, or if she needed to bring enough with her to last through her trip. She is a woman who’s taking control of her power – her response, so she can live her life as full and vibrantly as she can.

What about you?

Are you embracing your power to choose a response that best serves you?

How have you changed your response to LBL moments to produce better outcomes in your life? Have you started pelvic floor exercises? Compared notes with your girlfriends? Seen a medical professional? Please share. You never know how much your example may help and support others.

What do you want for the holidays? If you’re like me, you want to have a good time with family and friends, with as little stress as possible. Sometimes what you want is different than what you get.

Instead of an easy-going holiday season, you find yourself overwhelmed with shopping and travel (praying you’ll find a bathroom when you need it.) You beat yourself up for having too many tasty bladder-aggravating cocktails and spicy treats. And the very idea of having an LBL moment at a party leaves you feeling like retreating completely.

Follow this recipe to enjoy a happier, more stress-free holiday season this year.

Ingredients:

• 1 package of patience with yourself
• 1/2 cup full of gratitude for what’s going right.
• 1 level-headed choice to prepare an LBL emergency kit (extra LBL-specific pads, and panties tucked in your purse, and a just-in-case bag with a change of clothes.)
• A pinch more time taking care of yourself
• 2 times more positive self-talk than negative
• 1 juicy moment for reflecting on what’s really important
• 1 large focus on making happiness more important than perfection
• A dash of humor to taste

1. Chop holiday preparation chores into bite-sized, easily digested pieces, and distribute to family members, being careful not to mash their enthusiasm or yours.

2. Sift out and discard comparing yourself to others.

3. Trim away worry about what others might think.

4. Generously sprinkle words of encouragement for yourself and others. Blend until hearts melt.

5. Gently whisk away the need for perfection.

6. Simmer your nerves. If your temperature runs hot, share your feelings in a way others can hear you. Take time out to cool down if needed.

7. Combine family and friends together. Mix in laugh-out-loud memories.

8. Skim off your need to control.

9. Top the evening off with awareness that one in three women experience LBL. You’re not alone. Enjoying the holidays, even when you experience some LBL moments, will be liberating and inspire other women to live their lives to the fullest too.

Wishing you a happy holiday season and a joyful New Year!

Got a tip for managing LBL? Leave a comment to help the ladies in our community be stress-free this holiday season.

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Edited by MarilynSuttle at Dec 19, 2011 12:35 PM PST

“You’re such a girl,” my husband said. That’s his usual reaction to my choice of TV shows. He grumbled at the idea of watching a network that caters to women, but I sat through an old rerun of Terminator the night before, so it was my turn to pick the show. The topic of the episode was “Embarrassing Moments” and it featured an all-star panel, including a prominent woman money expert.

This woman carries herself well. She’s attractive, successful, and quite confident. When she was asked to be the first on the panel to share her embarrassing moment, she said, “Oh my goodness, there are so many.” Can you guess which embarrassing moment she chose to share? That’s right! She shared an LBL moment.

It happened while taping her first PBS special. When she coughed a bit to clear her throat, she leaked all the way down her leg. Click here to view the segment.
What’s important to notice is how comfortable she was talking about it on national television. She shared a very human moment. That’s really all there is to it. Though at the time it was happening to her, she was obviously mortified.

The English language is filled with expressions that imply that we can actually lose our lives to the feeling of embarrassment: “I nearly died of embarrassment.” “It would kill me if anyone finds out.” “I don’t know how I’d survive the embarrassment.” Here’s some good news. I discovered that after every embarrassing moment I’ve ever had – I lived!

Have you ever noticed that embarrassing moments, once shared, can turn into laugh-out-loud moments of camaraderie with your best girlfriends? It’s time for women to stop holding themselves up to the standard of perfection. No one is perfect , not even famous money experts. Being real about your life experiences can even make you more likeable and relatable. After all, one in three women experiences light bladder leakage. You aren’t alone.

The phrase that helps me get over those momentary feelings of embarrassment best is, “So what? Now what?” It nips the self-judgment, and focuses me on what exciting thing is next for me to do.

What about you?

What was your most embarrassing LBL moment? Read about mine and the other ladies in our community on our women’s Word Wall.

Women use the “Ask Marilyn” box to send me questions every day. I’m often asked:

• Is there a way to stop LBL?
• Does weight have an effect on bladder control?
• What kind of exercises can I do to prevent leaks?

Recently I received this question: “Is it true that doctors are using Botox injections for LBL?”

Botox? I had to read the question twice. When in doubt, I check things out with a reliable medical expert. I reached out to Kenneth M. Peters, M.D., professor and chairman of the Urology department at Oakland University William Beaumont School of Medicine.

Dr. Peters explained that Botox is indeed used successfully under certain circumstances to reduce leakage. And it’s not for everyone. It was just approved last month by the FDA for the neurogenic bladder. It’s typically used for certain people who experience urge incontinence, characterized by a strong and sudden urge to go.

“In general, our initial treatments for those who experience urge incontinence are behavioral,” Dr. Peters explained. He encourages women to eliminate food and drinks that are irritating to the bladder, use Kegel exercises properly to calm bladder muscle spasms, andsometimes he suggests overactive bladder (OAB) medications.

Another treatment Dr. Peters often tries before Botox is something called InterStim Neuromodulation. “When the nerves are hyperactive, the bladder contracts, resulting in leakage. In simple terms the brain is sending the wrong signals,” Dr. Peters said, “What Interstim does is send a signal with an electrical impulse to the bladder so it becomes less overactive. A benefit of Interstim over Botox is that it not only helps the bladder, but also often improves bowel function.”

“I thought Botox was only used for smoothing out wrinkles,” I said to Dr. Peters.

“What’s interesting about a wrinkle is it’s actually a muscle spasm,” Dr. Peters said, “When you inject Botox into a wrinkle it relaxes. The bladder is a muscle and will leak suddenly due to a spasm. Botox will relax the bladder.”

He explained that Botox is delivered to the bladder through little cameras. “We look into the bladder and with a tiny needle inject 20- 30 spots,” said Dr. Peters, “The procedure can be done in the office in about 15 minutes, and most tolerate it very well. There is a low risk of complications from it, and patients go home right afterwards.”

He cautions that it doesn’t work on the first day. It takes 5 to 14 days to take effect. “The studies on Botox has shown anywhere from 65 to 80 percent will have a significant reduction of leakage,” Dr. Peters said.

“Do your patients ask you to save a few injections for their face too?” I asked. Dr. Peters laughed. He hears that a lot.

How long does a Botox treatment last?

According to Dr. Peters the treatment typically has to be repeated every 6 months or so. “Most patients are very happy with the results,” Dr. Peters said. They prefer it to the typical side effects of OAB medications like dry mouth. “Most patients stop taking medication within a year because they find it doesn’t work well enough to counter the cost and side effects,” Dr. Peters said.

A potential risk of Botox (which happens to 3 to 5 percent of patients) is that the treatment works too well and you can’t urinate, in which case you need to use a catheter. “It’s a conversation we always have with patients,” said Dr. Peters, “We have some patients that leak so bad that they feel it’s okay if they haveto use a catheter for a while.”

So there you go! Botox is another option available to some women who experience unwanted leaks. And that’s not the only newer treatment out.

“As of January of this year, we’ve also got Tibial Nerve Stimulation,” Dr. Peters said. The tibia is a bone in your leg. Apparently they can now use a device near your ankle (much like an acupuncture needle with an electrical current) that somehow affects the bladder, offering a 60 – 70 percent bladder leakage reduction after 12 weeks!

What about you?

Are you using behavioral treatments, like pelvic floor exercises or other ways to manage your LBL? Have you talked with your medical professional recently?

Have you heard? November 14 through 18 is Bladder Health Week! The National Association For Continence is getting people talking about the topic of bladder health. Yippee! I’m so excited to see that people are getting comfortable talking about LBL. It’s amazing what can happen when one woman shares her experience with another.

• You don’t feel so alone.
• You find creative solutions that really help.
• You get to support the people you care about.

When women talk, solutions show up. One of my favorite quotes is, “The more you want to know, the more you’ll find out.” What questions do you have? Do you know what foods are bladder-friendly? Could it be that one of your girlfriends might have experiences to share with you?

Challenge yourself during Bladder Health Week to learn a bit more about LBL , and get the conversation started.

I’m writing this blog post from the aisle seat of my flight from San Diego to Detroit. Aisle seats rock! You may get your elbows bumped by the beverage cart, but it’s worth it to have easy access to the bathrooms when the urge hits. I’m flying back from speaking at a 5-day event. During my time there, I witnessed women experiencing one LBL situation after another.

The first LBL moment occurred for a whole group of women at once. I was sitting in the back of the room (my presentation was slated for 3:30 p.m.) About two hours after lunch the speaker before me realized it was time for an energizer to manage the afternoon slump that makes audiences a bit droopy.

He asked everyone to stand and do something called the “Bounce and Shake.” It’s a Qigong practice, similar in some ways to yoga. While keeping your feet firmly on the floor, you bend your knees in a bouncing motion in time to the music, while shaking your hands. It looks a bit silly. Though, it’s a fun and effective way to quickly energize your body. Shortly after the bouncing started, I noticed one, two, three, four, five women get up and walk briskly out of the room. Then, several more women gathered the courage to get up and head out the doors. I knew what was going on. Luckily, the presenter noticed it too and gave everyone a quick bathroom break before we did any more bouncing. Imagine bouncing on a full bladder! Lesson learned – it’s okay (and smart) to excuse yourself from activities to go to the bathroom when you need to go.

The next LBL moment occurred yesterday. It was the last day of the training. To celebrate and anchor the big breakthroughs that our participants had made over the last five days, we gave everyone an opportunity to break a wooden board with their bare hands. It was thrilling to watch people confront their disbelief, and discover what’s possible. I watched as everyone succeeded at breaking their boards. As I observed them, a woman in her early-forties came running over to me. “You’re the Poise lady. I need your help. I just wet myself when I broke through my board,” she said, turning around so I could see her back-side, “Can you see any wet spots?” Luckily she was wearing dark pants, and it didn’t show. She was so exhilarated by her accomplishment that it was virtually impossible to feel embarrassed in that moment. She breathed a big sigh of relief when I assured her that her little oops was not visible, and ran back to cheer on her friends as they broke through their boards.

Imagine being so invigorated by your life that those small leaks are simply a slight inconvenience that needs to be managed. Lesson learned – you may experience leaks, but it doesn’t have to stop you from experiencing joy in your life.

How about you? What breakthroughs have you experienced that make it easier for you to manage LBL and get on with living?

I just got back from 10 days in beautiful Alberta, Canada. I spent time with some pretty amazing people while I was there. One was my dear friend Jennifer Hough. She’s a nutritionist, author, and creator of “Get Out of Your Own Way™” specializing in people living in ease and flow. While we were chatting over a cup of tea, I discovered that she spoke at the International Incontinence Symposium in Toronto. I immediately asked her for an interview.

Stress and embarrassment became the focus of our conversation because of the toll it takes on those of us who experience LBL. “Stress is not just in your head,” Jennifer said, “It causes a pH imbalance in the body that causes the fluid in your body to shift in alkalinity. When it shifts, it actually aggravates your bladder.”

What can be done to release the stress?

“Stress happens when you predict a future that hasn’t happened yet, and you act like its real right now,” said Jennifer. If you find yourself worrying about what might happen the next time you leak, it helps ask yourself questions that will make your logical mind come back to the present moment where you’re not experiencing the leaks.

Jennifer suggests getting a stack of sticky notes, and writing three questions on them. Make eight sets, and post them all over your house, in your car, or anywhere you tend to worry.

The first question is this:

“Is the thing that I’m most afraid of (LBL) happening right now?”

If you’re afraid that you’ll die of embarrassment or be incredibly judged by someone, ask yourself, “Is it happening right now? The answer is going to be “no.” Then you can breath and your mind can calm enough to ask the other questions.

The next question is:

“Is it possible to feel at peace right now (with or without LBL)?”

The answer is always yes. Of course you can. Even if you’re leaking right now, it’s possible to be at peace.

The third question is:

“What can I do right now?”

If you experience LBL, you can either suffer about it or do something about it. Instead of suffering, do something. Most women who experience LBL have all sorts of coping strategies in place or resources (like this blog) to find new ideas, and reach out for support.

Jennifer also offered a nutritional strategy to support your nervous system and adrenals from stress so that it doesn’t affect you so much. She suggests you take a stress B complex multivitamin. “Take two at breakfast and two at lunch,” said Jennifer, “People start calling it their happy pill because it expands your ability to cope with stress, so that your pH stays more neutral longer. You’re less reactive because you have the nutrients in your body necessary to cope with stress, so you’re not scrambling.”

The more I start the conversation about light bladder leakage, the more useful ideas I discover. Jennifer’s suggestions are simple and easy to apply. What strategies do you have in place for managing LBL?